I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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