ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
