I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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