i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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