You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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