nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
The power of my boobs compel you
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize