Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize