scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
