I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
