I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
i black out too much to be "responsible"
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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