just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
