I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
