My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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