Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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