just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Ladies don't puke and tell
These tits shall not be calmed
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize