apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
