Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Randomize
