This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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