I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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