i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
