Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Need sex. Gaining weight.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
