I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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