i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
