I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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