I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Randomize
