I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
