your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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