i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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