Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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