I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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