He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
