walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
