My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
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