She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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