dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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