Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize