It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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