soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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