is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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