I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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