the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
My breasts were aching with rage.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
