Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
