i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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