please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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