ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
