If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
