I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Randomize
