All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
