Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
