im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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